Webby Nominees

I know. I've never heard of the Webby Awards either. It appears to be an attempt to class up the internet by adding a glitzy awards show. Because that always works. If it weren't for the AVN award, the porn industry would be just, well, sleazy.

And it's not like there aren't thousands of web awards already. And since no one cares about an award they've never heard of, being a random guy's Cool Site of the Day probably carries as much weight as winning a Webby. However, I can't think of anything else to write about just at the moment, so let's take a look at the Webby nominees anyway.

Um . . . actually, let's not. There's twenty-seven categories, which means 135 nominees. And although I spend more time online than the average person, I only know six or seven of them. A lot of these sites, I've never even heard of. But I guess it's worth mentioning at this point that ChickClick is nominated in two categories and Plastic is nominated in one.

I was ready to dismiss the awards as just an irrelevant waste of time (which would make them the ideal symbol of the Internet!), but then I found out that there's an actual awards ceremony. They expect over 3,000 people at the San Francisco War Memorial Opera House, and there will be red carpets, and tuxedos, and generally a lot of people trying just as hard as they possibly can to pretend that their awards aren't a sham.

I understand how they feel, but I personally like sham awards. I'm presistently tempted to go to a trophy store and buy myself seven or eight cups and statuettes to distribute around my apartment to create the illusion that I'm an "award-winner". And I think it's even funnier if the trophies themselves are clearly bogus on close inspection.

What would be really great is if they let me bring in my own little statuettes for the tops of the trophies. So instead of having a baseball or football player up there, I could have a bronzed Boba Fett. Yeah. That'd be cool.