Okay, That Was Weird

So I was sitting right here in front of my computer, twenty minutes ago. I was trying to think of something mildly entertaining to write about, and I was coming up dry. I mean, I've got a couple of Emergency Backup Topics in my head, but they're not fully formed yet, so I don't want to waste them.

Adding to my troubles was the fact that I was out of Coke. So I came up with an Ingenious Plan, in which I would walk four blocks to the Circle K and get a twelve-pack of Coke. It's late, but I enjoy walking at night. It's pleasant to not have to worry about traffic.

I realized, of course, that a few minutes of walking to a convenience store probably wouldn't provide me with brilliant comedic inspiration, unless there was something in the Circle K even more otherworldly than normal. But at worst, I was guaranteed to end up with some Coke. Which is always good.

So I put on my black trenchcoat, realizing even as I did that I was dressing up like one of those "modern vampires" you read about. As soon as I was in the parking lot, I noticed that something was amiss. Specifically, there isn't ordinarily an unoccupied police car there. Neat. I continued on my way to the store, and passed four more police cars, all empty. As I reached the Circle K, I saw that there was an officer with a police dog in the gas station across the street. And a helicopter was circling the area between the Circle K (where I now was) and my apartment building.

So I was clearly very close to something very interesting indeed. But not so close that it was affecting me personally. Life is like that sometimes; if you take the back way out of my parking lot at work, you stare directly at the place where WebVan used to be. In fact, I think it used to be the headquarters of HomeGrocer before they got bought out. And now it's just a fenced-in collection of trucks.

A fenced-in collection of trucks

So I got to Circle K, and bought my Coke. I did, in fact, score one mildly amusing observation: they were selling a collection of framed prints. the three I saw were Jesus, the Virgin Mary, and Shaq. Nice.

Then I took my Coke and walked the three or four blocks back home. After a minute or so, I noticed that I could see my shadow, which isn't normal for 10:30 pm. I looked behind me, but there was nothing there. Then I looked up, and the helicopter's searchlight was, in fact, pointed at me. I shrugged, figuring that it was random chance, and kept walking. After a few more minutes of still being in the spotlight, I looked back up, spread my arms in the universal gesture for "What?" and showed them that all I had was a twelve-pack of Coke. They kept the searchlight on me.

But they didn't bust out the bullhorn to tell me to lie facedown on the ground or anything, so I shrugged again and kept walking. The light followed me for some time, while I tried as hard as I could to look like a decent, law-abiding citizen who was merely going out for some Coca-Cola, even if I was wearing a black trenchcoat and looking uncomfortably up at the police helicopter. It's hard to look law-abiding when you're glancing behind you at a police helicopter, that's all I'm saying.

Eventually, they got tired of following my nonchalant stroll and backed off. And then I got home and drank a Coke and wrote this. And you know, I'm okay with not having an action-packed entry today. Because it seems like the alternative would have involved interrogations of some sort.